5 Reasons Marketers Are Like Pathological Narcissists

The customer is always right, right? Companies certainly want you to believe this, but are they simply exploiting your psychology to sell product?

Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) involves a pervasive pattern of self-importance, a need for admiration, a lack of empathy, and manipulative behavior. The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5) lists nine essential features used to diagnose this disorder. Interestingly, these features tend to describe some common strategies for effective marketing.

The Paradox of Narcissism and Branding

Advertisers spend fortunes researching what it’s like to walk in the customer’s shoes to respond to their wants and needs. Why is this “customer-centric” industry so self-centered? Narcissists, like advertisers, can be as grating as nails on a chalkboard, but they’re also charming and skilled at meeting their needs. Companies spend $1 trillion on marketing globally for a good reason: It works! But it comes with a cost even greater than its exorbitant price tag.

Narcissism is repeatedly described paradoxically in research. For example, Kampe et al. (2021) put it, “Its grandiose facet depicts the psychopathological core but is often associated with life-satisfaction and overall functioning.” Kernberg (1975) reveals “a curious apparent contradiction between a very inflated concept of themselves and an inordinate need for tribute from others.” And Morf and Rhodewalt (2001) point out, “as they yearn and reach for self-affirmation, they destroy the very relationships on which they are dependent.”

Despite some benefits, both narcissists and marketers have a big problem. Research among narcissists confirms they are less liked in the long run (Paulhus, 1998). They resolve this conundrum by being short-term oriented. The intention of narcissists is immediate admiration, not mutual affinity (Emmons, 1989; Morf and Rhodewalt, 2001). In many ways, marketers behave in an uncannily similar fashion. The critical problem for both is they must constantly target new “unaware customers” to supply their needs.

Brand Love at First Sight

Researchers explored these contradictions by asking observers to rate subjects they had never met before based upon their in-person self-introductions. These subjects also filled out a questionnaire to measure traits of narcissism. Narcissists were found to be more popular at first sight. Even more troubling, narcissists with a sense of entitlement and a tendency to manipulate and exploit others were viewed as the most appealing (Back et al., 2010). In other words, the most destructive long-term traits (i.e., exploitativeness and entitlement) proved to be most attractive upon initial impressions.

The experimenters confirmed the original results of their in-person test using three additional conditions: (1) video with sound, (2) video with muted sound, and (3) photographic images (i.e., the stimuli commonly used in ad media). The reasons narcissists were liked most mirrored features of protagonists in ads (e.g., “their flashy and neat clothing, their charming facial expressions, their self-assured body movements, and their humorous verbal expressions”). Since ads are intended to drive positive impressions and short-term sales, it makes sense that these “attractive” features can benefit companies.

Advantages Over Illnesses

If we rethink why narcissism exists in the first place, these confusing contradictions appear less counterintuitive. Recent research suggests narcissism may not be an illness, per se (though high-enough levels can lead to impairment), but a survival strategy with adaptive advantages. Holtzman et al. (2015) suggest that narcissism has been selected to elevate social status and facilitate short-term mating. Grapsas et al. (2019) found the dominant motive of narcissists is increased status, and this overshadows their need for close relationships. Papageorgiou et al. (2019) observe that grandiose narcissism helps people succeed through positive traits like confidence, mental toughness, and goal orientation. If these evolved tendencies help individuals climb the social ladder, can these same behaviors help brands ascend and lead markets?

A Method to Their Madness

As it turns out, narcissism, while often described as a disorder, also may describe an orderly process for effective marketing. The same cluster of behaviors that constitute NPD in the DSM-5 can be demonstrated in marketing tools and strategy. There are nine essential features, five of which qualify someone as having the “disorder.” Here are five behaviors seen through the lens of some branding “best practices”:

1. Has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements).

Brands, by their nature, add value not contained in the product. Is it a stretch to reframe the main motive of marketing as simply taking the most amount of credit with the least amount of effort? Marketing is aimed at efficiency best measured as “return on investment” (ROI), or the ratio between net income and costs. And it’s undeniably easier and cheaper to improve ads than products. Few will argue advertising by design creates perceived value, not just real value.

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Bombarding you with a constant, refreshed stream of engaging content touting how great their brand is may seem off-putting, but exposure to these superiority claims also convinces you that it’s true. That’s because “repeated information is often perceived as more truthful” due to a cognitive bias known as the “illusory truth effect” (Hassan and Barber, 2021). We decide on the truthfulness of information partly based on “process fluency,” or how familiar or easy the message is to recognize. Pepsi may beat Coke in blind taste tests, but more people still buy Coke.

2. Believes that he or she is “special” and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions).

Brands connect you to the “right” people. Is the real motive of marketing to connect you to the right product, or is it mostly to divide and conquer market landscapes into aspirational tribes called “branded communities”? A brand, at its best, is a social construct and a badge signaling your connection to a cooler club, not just a better product. This strategy would benefit companies by leveraging your natural tendency to surround yourself with like-minded, trusted people whose opinions matter. And this may likely help grow market share through groupthink, a cognitive bias that finds well-intentioned consumers making irrational choices due to a desire to fit in with a cohesive group. Harley Davidson may not be the most reliable motorcycle, but Harley Owners Group (HOG) members still pay a hefty price for the undeniably cool “street cred” the brand affords on and off the road.

3. Requires excessive admiration; and

4. Is interpersonally exploitative.

Brands trap you inside a confirmation bias bubble. While branded communities offer helpful tips to customers, is the greater goal here assisting you in making better, more considered choices? Marketers use artificial intelligence to keep you scrolling through their branded content by monitoring your actions on social media. Machine learning uses adaptive algorithms to filter ads to reflect your personal tastes and preferences. This triggers a “confirmation bias,” or a natural tendency to seek information consistent with your beliefs while blocking access to opposing viewpoints. These resonating “echo chambers” disproportionately magnify the opinions of “brand fans,” further accelerating the aforementioned “illusory truth” effect. Brands further widen their appeal by paying big money to hire famous, flashy, charming, self-assured, humorous, and self-centered influencers who do their bidding and sing the praises of the brand to their legions of faithful followers.

5. Has a sense of entitlement (i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations).

Brands interrupt ad nauseam. Marketers want loyal customers, but is all this really the right approach to satisfying their customers or even themselves? Narcissists are drinking from a bottomless glass that always seems half empty. Marketers constantly seek their narcissistic supply by capturing customers in their “purchase funnel.” This leaky bucket finds them in a state of rinse and repeat. Because they know the power of repeated ad exposures, they force your attention, despite your protests, through a stream of email and text spam, re-targeting ads that follow you around the Web, forced exposure videos embedded before and within other videos, “pop-up” banners, and, of course, their perennial favorite, the good old-fashioned TV commercial.

Advertisers further overcome the short-term nature of their appeals by becoming experts in identifying and sometimes exploiting the vulnerabilities of unsuspecting others. Do they invoke the myriad consumer biases as opportunities to nudge you toward better, easier lives, or is it just about forcing your hand into automatic sales compliance without your knowing?

Advertisers Must Evolve to Remain Sustainable

Psychological research has repeatedly forewarned of this vicious circle. To illustrate this last point, one experiment asked participants to represent a forestry company that could harvest up to 10 hectares of forest each year, with the remaining foliage growing back at an annual rate of only 10 percent. They asked subjects how much they would choose to harvest over 25 rounds, or until they depleted the forest. Those scoring higher on narcissism were more likely to report a higher desire for profit and deplete the forest in pursuit of short-term profit (Campbell et al., 2005).

Spending trillions of dollars prioritizing perceived value over real innovation is neither progress nor sustainable. The biggest red flag for advertisers is that their most prized and heavily targeted consumers—young, affluent, tech-savvy millennials and Gen Z—just don’t get it. They hate ads so much they pay to avoid them, choosing platforms like Netflix or YouTube Premium. The silver lining in all of this is that marketers become powerless if they “destroy the very relationships on which they are dependent.” Increasing consumer awareness of this disconcerting similarity between pathological narcissism and effective marketing is the first step to forcing the hands of advertisers for a change—for the better.