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I recently came across this youtube video, which has since made national news. It is a video of a high school student being thrown to the ground from her chair by a school resource officer. After throwing her from her desk, he dragged her across the floor and places her in handcuffs.
Upon first watching this, the question that comes to mind is what led to this physical altercation? Reports state that the student was using her cell phone in the classroom and was asked to leave the class. Upon refusing to leave the class, the teacher called an administrator to convince her to leave the classroom. When the school administrator was not successful in convincing the student to leave the classroom, the school resource office was called, who after experiencing a lack of success in convincing the girl to leave the classroom, resorted to violence.
This sad situation could have been prevented, starting with the teacher. Educators and clinicians who work with children and adolescents, make a terrible mistake when they engage with power struggles with their students or clients. For example, if the student was expressing her defiance by simply refusing to speak or move from her desk, the teacher had one or two options, either ignore her completely and go on teaching the class or inform her that she would experience point deductions from her overall grade if she refused to leave. From the second option, you can get more creative with the types of consequences the girl should receive if she chooses to remain in the classroom. For example, I would have informed the girl that she would be losing one grade point from her overall grade for every minute she remained in the chair. From then on, I would have set a timer and continued teaching the class.
The science behind this approach is that as long as the young person is not presenting as a threat to herself or others, there is no need for a physical confrontation. Non-violent defiance should be met with non-violent persuasion. In this sad incident the teacher, the administrator and the resource office all displayed poor leadership skills by escalating a peaceful inconvenience. They all failed to recognize that their power as adults, in the the life of that adolescent was not threatened by her refusal to listen to their requests. Further, they all failed to acknowledge and recognize her personal power to refuse in listening.
From professional experience, I have experienced consistent success in using non-violent approaches to persuade compliance from a defiant teen. For seven years I worked at a therapeutic boarding school where any form of physical restraint was not tolerated by policy. This was a significant shift and a breath of fresh air from the previous two programs I had worked for, where so called therapeutic restraints for non-complaint adolescents where mandated and taught to staff.
In the previous two programs, there was at least one restraint executed every week, while in the last program I worked for, there were none.
The differences between the first two programs I worked for when compared to the last program was the psychological mindset of the staffs. Specifically pertaining to their beliefs regarding conflict resolution. In the first two programs, each staff, particularly those who where athletically fit had the option to use violence when dealing with a defiant youth, lingering in the back of their minds. Versus the non-aggressive/non-violent approach of the last program I worked for. This non aggressive policy forced each and every staff member to put aside their ego and explore every solution possible for resolving the conflict and bringing about compliance.
The reason the latter is so successful is because, when violence is not an option between an adult and a child or adolescent, the adult is forced to view the situation with an open mind as he explores a variety of solutions to solve the problem. When violence is presented as an option, conflicts with others are seen through the lens of the primal brain. As a lot of emphasis is placed on the ego and maintenance of one's pecking order in a social hierarchy.
Certain types of beliefs promote or hinder access to solution focused thinking, and a commitment to a non-aggression principle is a belief that promotes greater access to peaceful and effective solutions during conflicts.
