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Ken Siri
Ken Siri
Autism

Autism as Opportunity

How Alex is my Angel

A few years ago I started to take yoga classes. Initially it was to help with my fitness routine, running, triathlon and such, as I get a bit older. Keep the flexibility and all. But it has taken on a life of its own, and is a prime factor in keeping me positive, fit and helping me become more present, engaged and balanced in life.

Anyway, recently after a “hot” class (just started exploring that part of yoga), a fellow student asked me about my practice, having been in the same class together for a while. She inquired as to my schedule, what classes/teachers I suggest she try. Most of the classes I mentioned were in the middle of the day, she commented on how it was unusual for a guy to be in yoga during mid-day (which is true, often I am the only guy in class–and I’m not complaining).

I proceeded to give the abridged version of my story (see blog here for more), single sole-custody dad of a 15-year-old boy with non-verbal autism for the past six years. How being in this position I had to give up my Wall Street career, travel and what was a fairly extensive social life. How I had to adjust my lifestyle from then to now. A brief look of sympathy came across her face–as often happens with those who are unaware of what challenges parents of special needs kids face.

I then described the many advantages (as I see it) of this change, or transformation if you prefer. Flexible schedule, having to become an entrepreneur and create one’s own income stream, the ability to care fully for my son and help him make progress in his life. I did this in part on instinct, as I frequently have to describe this life to the uninitiated, but also partly (at first) to allay her sympathy or her need to express such.

She then said how tough it must be, how difficult and hard to have to give up the old lifestyle. My though then changed to sympathy for her! For her thinking that this transformation has been negative for me, for thinking that I was just putting on a spin for her or myself. When in reality I feel lucky and privileged to have been given this life of meaning and mission.

My parent friends, though others may view our lives, our children as burdens to us, the truth is they are our angels giving us purpose. How many of the uninitiated have meaning, have purpose. Let me know if you feel the same!

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About the Author
Ken Siri

Ken Siri is a freelance writer and the father of a boy with autism.

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