He's Just Not That Into You

Well, he might be, but don't rely on a married friend to analyze how your love interest feels about you. Among young adults, those who are in love or have had a long-term relationship are the worst at identifying how other couples feel about each other, according to one study.

Frank Bernieri, a psychologist at Oregon State University, had 168 college students watch video clips of 45 couples who had previously been surveyed by researchers to determine their level of infatuation with each other. Bernieri asked the students to rate each pair's bond, on the assumption that those who were infatuated themselves would be best able to recognize love when they saw it.

"We thought that if you'd been loveless your whole life, it would be tough," he says. He was therefore surprised to find that people in relationships are not only bad at diagnosing love in others, but also most confident in their ability to assess how others are getting along.

Why are seasoned lovers so oblivious? Reporting in the Journal of Nonverbal Behavior, Bernieri suggests that they tend to develop particular ideas about what love is, preventing them from seeing the wide variety of ways others show it.

"It's likely they're projecting their own feelings onto other couples," he says. "If someone is very touchy-feely and enjoys displays of affection, they'll look for those specific cues because that's how they express love."