Verified by 
Key points
- Many myths about retirement and aging may not be true.
- Negative beliefs can contribute to poorer health.
- Reframing beliefs about aging can promote health.
Last fall, I volunteered to check in new first-years at my alma mater. I was seated at a table of older adults all remembering what it had been like when we first arrived. I attend luncheons on healthy brain aging, and alumni events online or in person. I joined a local social club, and even registered for a group trip to London to see theater. A friend mentioned purchasing an RV and I fantasized about joining them on a trip to Sedona. Phrases like, “She looks way too young to be an executive/director/CEO/mother,” escape my mouth. When did I get this way?
I may be the cliché of what my former self thought an older person might become, so I decided to delve deeper. Turns out, I’m not “over the hill,” and if you’re reading this, you aren’t either. Here’s why.
Older adults are happier. Ageism is one of the last socially sanctioned biases in America. Think about it: how often do you unconsciously appreciate younger adults vs. older, whether in person or online? But older adults are happier than their younger counterparts. David Blanchflower found this to be true in 145 countries. Happiness decreases until about age 50 (perhaps because so many are still in the throes of parenting teens and/or young adults?), but then increases from then on. Getting older can include some of the best and most happy years of life.
Your mental health has likely improved. Additional research shows, for those without dementia, life satisfaction increases with age, while depression and anxiety decrease. If you haven’t found this to be the case for you, it may be worth trying the suggestions below, and/or reaching out for help.
You have more time for relationships, including with siblings and friends. Siblings may grow closer again in older adulthood, and women with sisters have especially warm relationships. These are people who have known you longer than anyone else. They share your history and love you anyway! Older adults also tend to have good friends they interact more with as well. These friendships and relationships can improve well-being.
You can change your beliefs on aging if they get you down. If you have negative beliefs about aging, you’re not alone. You can reframe this important time of life—for yourself, your loved ones, and society at large:
- Use a “sensory diet.” Those who spend more time on media—print, TV, or online—tend to feel even more negative about aging, so be conscious of your “sensory diet”: what you read, watch, and hear.
- Notice your thoughts. When you note a negative thought about your own—or someone else’s—age, tell yourself something like, “Everyone is different. Older adulthood can be a happy, satisfied time,” and know that research supports this.
- Mix it up. There has possibly never been a time on the planet when people of different ages were so segregated as they are now. Being in intergenerational groups is healthy for older and younger people. Make sure some of your daily or weekly outings, exercise, social moments (even with strangers) include different ages.
- Watch your language. Words matter, and they can display implicit biases. How often do you use or hear terms like “elderly,” “seniors,” “senior citizens,” “aged,” or “silver tsunami”? These terms stigmatize and have power, including reinforcing negative aging stereotypes. Instead, say, “older person/woman/man,” “older individual/s,” “older adults,” or “greater numbers of older adults.” You and others will internalize this more inclusive language, and positive beliefs along with it.
Aging can involve physical or cognitive decline, sure, but not for everyone. It’s very individual and we are not statistics. Older adulthood can signal a happier, more contented, and satisfied time of life than ever, full of purpose and wisdom. You’ve earned it!
