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Patience: The Key to Navigating Life's Unexpected Turns

Personal Perspective: By cultivating patience, we can find peace in the face of difficulties.

Image by PIRO from Pixabay
Source: Image by PIRO from Pixabay

I recently had a surprising experience that shed light on the power of patience, a virtue I didn't even realize I was practicing. It all started with the Super Bowl. As one of the biggest sporting events in the US, I try to watch it every year, even though I'm not a huge sports fan. This year, I invited my elderly relative who lives in Arizona to stay with me and watch the game. We also planned to visit another relative of hers, who lived a couple of hours away, and watch the Super Bowl at her house.

The Tech Challenge

When we arrived at my relative's friend's house, we discovered a slight problem: she had a TV and cable but had never used them. So, there I was, tasked with getting this television working in time for kickoff! I fiddled with the remote, checked the connections, and still, nothing. Thankfully, she lived in a retirement community with an office that offered support for their cable package. A helpful man came over and quickly diagnosed the issue: no cable box.

Okay, no problem, I thought. We'll just use the Paramount app! I had a subscription, and luckily, the Super Bowl was streaming there. But of course, this being the most-watched television event in US history, the app was overloaded. I didn't have my password readily available, so I had to request it, wait for it to arrive (which took ages), and then input it before it expired. This process repeated itself several times. Just when I thought I had finally cracked the code, I'd accidentally hit a button on the remote and lose the connection, having to start all over again.

A Lesson in Patience

After what felt like an eternity, I finally got the game streaming. By that point, we were already well into the second quarter. I had missed a good chunk of the game, but I was just relieved to have it working. What struck me most about this whole ordeal was the reaction of the two ladies, both in their 80s. They were amazed by my "patience," claiming they would have given up long ago. Their comment surprised me because I didn't feel particularly patient. I was simply focused on the task at hand, trying different solutions until something worked. I wasn't dwelling on my impatience or what I was missing. My energy was solely directed at resolving the issue.

The Power of Patience

This experience got me thinking about the importance of patience in navigating life's challenges. We all face difficult situations that test our limits. Patience allows us to approach these obstacles with a clear head, avoiding impulsive actions fueled by frustration or anger. It helps us focus on long-term goals rather than short-term setbacks.

Imagine if I had given in to my impatience with the TV. I might have damaged it or stormed off, missing the Super Bowl entirely. But by staying focused, I eventually found a solution. Patience fosters resilience and teaches us to persevere when things don't go as planned. It reminds us of that worthwhile achievements often take time and effort.

Patience in Life's Unexpected Turns

Life rarely goes exactly as we envision. We might be in a loving relationship, expecting to spend our lives with someone, only to have it abruptly end. In such situations, patience can prevent us from saying or doing something hurtful. It allows us to ask questions, seek support, and consider our options.

Whether dealing with a health crisis, challenges with our children, or any other unexpected event, patience empowers us to take things one step at a time. It allows us to stay present and focus on what we can do in the moment, rather than getting overwhelmed by the bigger picture.

The Beauty of Staying Present

The real beauty of patience lies in its ability to keep us grounded in the present. While I was troubleshooting the TV, I wasn't consumed by thoughts of the game I was missing. I was simply focused on the task in front of me. This allowed me to remain calm and enjoy the company of my relatives, even amidst the technical difficulties.

Patience also plays a crucial role in our interactions with others. When frustrations arise, patience prevents us from lashing out and encourages us to seek understanding and solutions.

Gratitude and Patience

Gratitude is a key component of patience. Instead of dwelling on what we lack, gratitude allows us to appreciate what we have. Research has shown that feelings of gratitude can reduce impatience. When we're grateful for the good in our lives, we're less likely to get caught up in frustration and impatience.

Cultivating Patience

So, how can we cultivate more patience in our lives?

  • Practice Gratitude: Focus on the positive aspects of your life and appreciate the things you have.
  • Embrace Change: Recognize that change is inevitable and resisting it only leads to suffering.
  • Focus on Solutions: When faced with a challenge, ask yourself, "How can I make this work?" Stay focused on finding solutions rather than dwelling on the problem.
  • Accept and Love What Is: Sometimes, despite our best efforts, things don't go our way. Patience allows us to accept and even love the outcome, finding peace in the present moment.

The Rewards of Patience

Developing patience takes effort, but the rewards are immense. Patience brings calmness, peace, and happiness. It allows us to navigate life's challenges with grace and resilience, ultimately leading to a more fulfilling and joyful existence.

Even though my Super Bowl Sunday started with a frustrating tech issue, it turned into a valuable lesson in patience. It reminded me that by staying present, focused, and grateful, we can overcome obstacles and find joy even in the most unexpected circumstances.

References

Schnitker, S. A. (2012). An examination of patience and well-being. The Journal of Positive Psychology, 7(6), 445-457.

This article delves into the relationship between patience and overall well-being. Schnitker developed a "3-Factor Patience Scale" to measure different types of patience (interpersonal, life hardship, and daily hassles). The study found that patience is indeed linked to greater well-being and that it plays a significant role in successful goal pursuit, especially when facing obstacles.

DeWall, C. N., et al. (2014). Gratitude and prosocial behavior: Helping when it costs you. Psychological Science, 25(5), 1099-1104.

This research explores the link between gratitude and prosocial behavior, specifically the willingness to help others even when it requires personal sacrifice. The study found that individuals feeling grateful were more likely to engage in helping behaviors.

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