Crazy Cat Lady: The Importance of Healing Anger and Misogyny

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Frankly, I was astounded to hear Kamala Harris, the Democratic candidate for U.S. President, referred to as a “childless cat lady.” It was shocking to have an educated, successful, and accomplished former state attorney general, U.S. Vice President, and Democratic Presidential candidate denigrated in this way. Women in the U.S. and around the world are making a quiet difference, one day at a time, whether through their work, volunteering, or just being kind and compassionate people. So, why is there this hatred and anger directed toward women? Look a bit deeper, and one realizes that women are unfortunately only one of the many groups at which anger has been directed, in the U.S. and around the globe.

The possible roots of this anger include intergenerational trauma (displayed as anger) directed at women, minority groups, or any person considered different than oneself. And certainly "group think" and crowd behavior—including the anonymity one gains online or when hiding behind groups—make targeting anger and hatred toward groups of people that much easier to get away with. But when we dig a bit deeper (much deeper), beneath that anger lies a profoundly hurt individual who finds that anger is an emotionally safer way to express their hurt inner child. One must bear in mind that the extremely hurt or traumatized individual usually has no clue that this is what’s happening. They just know that expressing anger opens a relief valve on the emotions churning inside, especially when activated by recent stressors.

What’s the answer to healing this psychological trauma, which displays itself as anger and hatred? If you haven’t guessed, the answer is in the question: emotional and psychological healing.

I can hear your collective groan. Everyone wants a quick fix; take a pill and all the pain goes away. While in certain cases, pharmaceutical intervention is necessary, oftentimes it merely addresses the symptom rather than delving into the trauma that the individual has experienced.

Certainly, there are political and social changes we can effect to address hate collectively as a society; this goes without saying. However, to truly address the issue on an individual level, it must also be dealt with on an individual level. The emotional pain and trauma that have been buried need to be addressed, in collaboration with a competent therapist or counselor, because the trauma impacts mental health and functioning.

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Additional healing measures can be taken concurrently with the emotional healing process, such as reducing one’s stress and utilizing integrative healing modalities such as yoga and sound bath. These practices may actively complement the emotional healing process and absolutely should not be discounted. In fact, research has shown that alternative healing methods such as yoga and sound healing can reduce stress and improve one’s sense of well-being. Moreover, many people who are not open to emotional healing may find these types of integrative healing methods more palatable than delving into past trauma. For certain individuals, these types of integrative healing modalities may be the only healing they wish to pursue, while others may be willing to dive into, and begin to heal, their traumas. Both groups are likely to receive substantial benefit from these types of alternative therapies if the practitioner providing the treatment is reputable and competent.

But it takes that first step to heal and move toward more peace in one’s life. So, take action: Call that therapist or find out about alternative healing methods, such as yoga and sound healing, in your area. As individuals and as a society, we can’t afford to procrastinate on healing any longer.

Healing starts now!