How Do We Choose?

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We are faced with choices to make every day, all day. After a while, we can even get “choice fatigue,” especially if we have had a long day, suffer from lack of sleep, or have been gathering information from the internet about our options.

According to Barry Schwartz, author of The Paradox of Choice, we are swamped with choices in just about every area of our lives. Just go to any grocery store and count up the offerings for cereals, potato chips, or types of milk. Then there’s insurance, medical care, utilities, cell phone, and retirement plans. Facing some of these choices can really seem scream-worthy!

Divide and conquer?

It’s apparent that we will always be faced with choices. So how do we narrow them down? How do we make choices that satisfy?

There are many types of choices. To keep it simple, let’s divide it up two ways.

There are choices that we have to make once in a while, like looking for a new car, a place to live, or even a spouse.

Then there are choices that we have to make every day. Things like how to divide up our time, what to wear, what emails to answer, or if we feel like watching the news.

Let’s drill down for a minute and look at a concrete example of how making choices can quickly get confounded. That would be in the daily decisions we make around what to eat and how to move.

Eating and exercise choices

When it comes to eating and exercise, it is definitely possible to just drift along. But suppose a person decides they want to make some changes in eating and exercise in order to feel healthier and possibly to lose a bit of weight. The options can seem endless.

There are plenty of things out there that can muddy the waters.

There is media and advertising. These entities lay in wait for you, trying to get you to buy their product or program, even trying to convince you that you should look or behave a certain way.

On top of that, we have other influences. We have our existing habits, customs, rules that we tend to follow, and our social circle. When we start looking around, the way to choose what to do can become challenging indeed.

When this happens, it is possible to make choices that are not based on who we really are or what our lives are like. A disconnect is created that ends with us being disheartened by our choices.

For example, perhaps a person has decided to go on a low-fat diet. They have read that it can really be effective for weight loss. Depending on their current habits, switching to low-fat may mean a complete turnaround. No more burgers, nibbling on chips, or sharing French fries with others. Pretty soon, these choices start to get old. Rebellion occurs, and it’s back to “normal.”

Another classic example is joining a gym to “get more fit.” That choice may be a radical departure from the person’s normal lifestyle. Joining a gym can be fulfilling, but many people don’t feel comfortable there. They can quickly stop going, preferring to stay in their comfort zone.

Turning it into a small choice can be effective.

In this case (and many others), there is wisdom in limiting the number of choices we are faced with. This can be especially effective when we are seeking to make some changes in our day-to-day habits and behaviors, like what to eat and how to move.

Part of the reason this works is that it limits the number of available options and keeps the focus on one thing at a time. For example, the goal can be narrowed down to eating five fruits or vegetables every day. First, a list of fruits and vegetables that appeal can be made, and then choices can be made from that list.

In terms of exercise, a similar list can be made. What does the person think they might enjoy, can fit into their days, and is appropriate for their level of fitness?

Starting from within

Approaching change in this way speaks to individual preferences, which creates autonomy. This method has some flexibility built in but limits the possibilities. Best of all, it requires the person to do some reflection, to know themselves, and to make choices that start from within.

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In this way, there is no comparison with others, and it controls expectations that may come from the outside. As in the example above, the person may eventually ditch the diet, saying, “I thought low-fat was the way to lose weight, but I hate it.”

In other words, it gets back to what has been shown again and again in research around behavior change: The most effective way to make lasting change is to tap into intrinsic (from within) motivation. Extrinsic (from outside) motivation is rarely sustainable.

So… we have the specific case of making choices that will be compatible with lasting, positive, and straightforward changes to eating and exercise. Keeping each choice small, focused, and personalized can relieve the stress of too many choices and lead to making some changes that last.

These principles can work in many areas, not just eating and exercise. As Barry Schwartz explains, cutting our choices down to just a few options can lead to freeing up some of our valuable time, appreciating what we have chosen, and developing greater peace of mind. Much better than being frustrated, anxious, or going into screaming mode!