Verified by 
TO-DO:
1) End homelessness
2) Feed the hungry
3) Make dentist appointment with Dr. Rubenstein/ask about nitrous
(refer to William James?)
4) Protect wildlife—lions, tigers, elephants, frogs, bees, whales, every fish in the plastic sea
5) Remove all plastic from sea/ring Elon about the viability of landfill on Mars/ask him for clean water & air ASAP/make priority over LA tunnel project
6) De-nuclearize, disarm everyone everywhere/hide sharp objects & sarin
7) Clean gutters/rake leaves/call deck guy for an estimate
8) END TROPHY HUNTING
9) Release refugee children from cages/reunite with parents/grant asylum to anyone who doesn't want to kill us
10) Eliminate fossil-fuels, make planet solar-powered, wind-powered, battery-powered, yet-to-be-discovered-powered/introduce electric transport everywhere (Elon again, if he has time)
11) Replace 3-way bulb in living room (LED?)/buy new bath mat/fill prescriptions for Wellbutrin, Paxil, Adderall, & Valium/stop taking baby aspirin says somebody on FB/continue COQ-10, Omega 3s, D3/B12, turmeric, magnesium, DHEA, NAC & all the other useless but expensive crap from Whole Foods/try Moringa?
12) Reverse warming temperatures & rise of oceans (IDEA! Dig ocean floors 6 feet deeper to compensate—possible?/ask Elon)
13) Stop destroying Amazon rainforest, effective immediately/take ayahuasca with indigenous shaman in Peru (ditto peyote/psilocybin/San Pedro cactus)/ legalize psychedelics/locate God, Allah, Brahman, Christ & Buddha Nature, negotiate religious treaty/serve them plant-based lunch
14) Call Aunt Judy (still alive???) /cousin Jenny re: Pap smear party
15) Free all the chickens/also cows and pigs/end factory farming & animal lab testing, especially on eyes of beagles/remove back lawn/grow arugula & snap peas
16) Also front lawn
17) Re-freeze Arctic ice shelf, Greenland, etc/ask Jimmy Carter if Habitat 4 Humanity can provide temporary housing for polar bears now balancing on one leg
18) Cease all sex-trafficking and sexual abuse of children/& adults/shoot perpetrators into outer space
19) Introduce equal pay, equal opportunities, equal education, equal food distribution, equal housing & basic needs for all humans, regardless of nationality, race, gender identity, sexual orientation, skin color, height, weight, IQ, EQ, Enneagram #, skills, abilities, sense of humor, and pre-existing conditions
20) Breathe/breathe again/try to breathe
21) Cure Alzheimer’s, ALS, asthma, autism, Parkinson’s, cancer, heart disease, emphysema, arthritis (rheumatoid & osteo), lupus, diabetes Type 1, Type 2, Types 3-5, hepatitis A, B, C, D, & E, cystic fibrosis, gluten sensitivity, celiac disease, lactose intolerance, meningitis, tuberculosis, herpes, chlamydia, all STDs, multiple sclerosis, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, Epstein-Barre, Hashimoto’s, flu, shingles, hay fever, Lyme disease/heal the blind, deaf, lame & crippled/acne
22) Schedule horseback riding lessons/volunteer meals-on-wheels?/take Tai Chi class, or Chi Gong, Tae Kwon Do, Jujitsu, or anything Asian-sounding/read an Alan Watts book/buy matcha, shoji screen & tatami mat
23) Add MDMA to White Nationalist water supply, also alt-Right, Aryan militias, KKK/hug a neo-Nazi, tell him most Jews are pretty funny
24) Eliminate pesticides, herbicides, insecticides, homicides, and suicides
25) Meditate, get enlightened, become spiritual guru/charge ton of money telling people to watch their breath (in AND out)/design advanced course/market to top 1% for ridiculous amount/write The Power of Then/tell Anthony Robbins to chill out a bit
26) Prevent global extinction of every living creature
27) Harry's 70th bday present: Apple Watch???
