Calling on Professionals to Be More Vulnerable and Authentic

"You cannot swim for new horizons until you have the courage to lose sight of the shore.”
-William Faulkner

Last week, the field of couple and family psychotherapy—and psychotherapy in general—lost one of its most salient pioneers of the last century, Dr. Sue Johnson. This is one of the main things I learned from her: Although professionalism has traditionally collided with vulnerability and personal disclosure ("don't share too much about yourself; be professional!"), professionals should be periodically, purposely, and strategically vulnerable as role models because healing, growth, connection, and learning (the most important things leaders and professionals stand for) usually require vulnerability.

In a world where almost everyone is pushing a facade on and off social media of how they want to be perceived, vulnerability and authenticity have grown progressively scarcer. Vulnerability and genuineness are how humans learn, grow, heal, and connect. Feeling connected to others is arguably the most important thing in the world. After all, what matters more in our lives?!

Vulnerability is how we build it with others. Courage is key to vulnerability. It comes from the Latin word "cor", which means to tell your whole story from the heart. So, it's the courage to be imperfect (Brown, 2015). No one's perfect; professionals have a responsibility to model this for the public. Connection, accordingly, comes from authenticity, courage, and vulnerability. It's the willingness to say "I love you" first, or the willingness to try something without its guarantee, like a business or a relationship (Brown, 2015). It's about letting ourselves be seen, believing that we’re enough, and "loving with our full hearts." I'd argue this is essential to health, and we as professionals have a responsibility to model this to the public. It can also help us with self-care, as constantly portraying a facade can be exhausting.

Supporting Research in Psychotherapy

We've known in psychotherapy that who the therapist is is much more influential to the outcome than the type of therapy one offers (Sprenkle, Davis, & Lebow, 2013). Humans tend to only really trust people who they can feel and connect to on some authentic, human level.

Still, professionals, particularly in mental health, often operate under the guise of perfectionism and invulnerability. However, professionals working with and purposely displaying their own vulnerability is gradually gaining recognition as a powerful tool (arguably the most powerful) for personal growth, fostering authentic connections, and driving healing and innovation. Thus, I believe professionals should embrace vulnerability as an essential component of their personal and professional development.

Related Thought Experiments

Think about the people that have had the biggest influence on you in your life. Whether you saw them give a presentation or met them personally, the odds are they brought their real selves into the encounter. Vulnerability speaks to us and resonates most deeply with us, and authenticity is a key language that influences us. So, as professionals, why would we want to model hiding oneself?

Now think about the last time you were vulnerable. The odds are you had to demonstrate strength to communicate your vulnerability. When professionals have the courage to be vulnerable, they create an environment where honesty and openness thrive. Authenticity builds trust among colleagues, clients, patients, and stakeholders, leading to stronger relationships and more meaningful collaboration. In a world inundated with superficial interactions, authenticity can stand out as a potent symbol of inspiration and connection. Next, I go into more detail on how vulnerability can enhance how professionals serve the public.

Getting More Specific

Vulnerability pushes us into personal growth. Admitting one's own mistakes and limitations not only requires bravery (a key quality to being human and thus to model as professionals) but also opens the door to learning and development. By acknowledging their own vulnerability, professionals can confront (or "care"-front) their needed "areas of improvement" head-on, seek support, and acquire new skills. Embracing vulnerability is not a sign of weakness but rather proof of resilience, strength, and a commitment to continuous improvement.

Vulnerability can also cultivate empathy and understanding. When professionals share their struggles and challenges, they create a sense of community in professional settings and a culture where individuals feel valued and supported. By empathizing with others' vulnerabilities, professionals and clients can better collaborate, communicate, and resolve conflicts effectively.

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Thirdly, vulnerability can drive innovation and creativity. In an environment where individuals feel safe to express their ideas without fear of judgment, creativity flourishes. We try new things we otherwise would have been embarrassed to try. A safe environment empowers people to bring forth ideas that they thought may not work out, instead of constantly following the status quo. We can't advance without risk-taking and we're more likely to risk-take when we have the courage to be vulnerable. This courage is a muscle that builds over time, and when professionals model vulnerability, they inspire others to do the same. When professionals are bold enough to share unconventional thoughts and take risks, they can open doors for groundbreaking solutions and novel approaches to the complex challenges of clients and clinicians alike. Innovation thrives in environments where vulnerability is embraced as a catalyst for change and progress.

Fourthly, vulnerability enhances resilience. In the face of the adversity and setbacks we all face, professionals who embrace vulnerability are better equipped to bounce back and persevere. By acknowledging their emotions and seeking support when needed, individuals can navigate challenges with greater determination. Vulnerability empowers professionals to confront obstacles with courage and resilience, turning setbacks into opportunities for growth and learning.

Conclusion

As mental health professionals, we are often encouraging clients to bond and heal through their own vulnerability. Wouldn't we be hypocritical not to do the same? Getting personal in my professional work (I've spoken publicly about my speech impediment, acne, bullying, etc) is always rewarding, salutary, and cathartic, but deeply challenging for me. It always feels like I'm going to risk being discovered as an imposter or fraud. This is, though, particularly what makes it powerful and rewarding: I get more support and cheer from my community, and the clinicians that look up to me do so even more when they can sense that I take this risk. This is also what encourages clients to do the same and progress in their therapy.

As Sue would advocate, professionals should embrace vulnerability as a powerful catalyst for personal and professional growth. By fostering authenticity, encouraging personal growth, cultivating empathy, driving innovation, and enhancing resilience, vulnerability can empower individuals to thrive in today's exponentially evolving world. Rather than fearing vulnerability, professionals should recognize it as a strength and a gateway to deeper connection, healing, creativity, and success.

As opposed to merely teaching facts, concepts, and theories, when you show people who you really are, it deeply touches them in a timeless way, planting in them the seed that they can do the same.