A Dozen Self-Care Strategies for Helpers and Caregivers

Chances are good that you’ve served in a helping or caregiving role for someone else at some point in your life. My definition of “helper or caregiver” is pretty broad. It includes not only those who work professionally in a helping role (health care workers, counselors, therapists, teachers, clergy, first responders) but also family and friends who provide care for loved ones with health issues, disabilities, and other limitations or challenges.

We’re learning more and more how stressful these helping and caregiving responsibilities can be, as the tasks involved often require long hours, physical stamina, sustained concentration, and emotional investment. In return, helpers and caregivers may receive little thanks or gratitude for their efforts.

Much has been written about the importance of self-care for helpers and caregivers. As it’s been often said, you can’t take care of someone else unless you take care of yourself first. The common analogy that may come to mind is putting your oxygen mask on first in an airplane before attempting to assist others.

Without proper self-care, many negative physical and emotional consequences can occur, variously labeled “burnout,” “compassion fatigue,” and “secondary or vicarious traumatization.” In some prolonged or severe circumstances, even post-traumatic stress disorders may arise.

Psychologists Thomas M. Skovholt and Michelle Trotter-Mathison provide a thorough discussion of one dozen areas for “nurturing oneself” to proactively manage and reduce stress and to prevent some of the more extreme negative consequences of helping or caregiving.

Let’s take a quick look at these 12 strategies for helpers and caregivers to improve their overall self-care.

1. Handling emotions

One approach to improve emotional self-care is to foster self-compassion, which includes being kind toward yourself in the face of adversity and not being overly self-critical, as well as accepting your flaws and forgiving yourself for your shortcomings. Emotional self-care can also include seeing a professional counselor or psychotherapist to bolster self-esteem, self-awareness, and self-understanding.

2. Financial management

Even though the work can be very satisfying, many helpers and caregivers are not well-compensated financially. Financial self-care includes practicing basic financial wellness strategies such as budgeting, sensible investing, and not falling prey to cultural messages that career or personal success should be equated with financial wealth.

3. Humor

Having a healthy sense of humor can be a great way to manage stress. However, it can often be difficult for helpers and caregivers to find humor when constantly faced with overwhelming demands. It’s important to actively look for jokes, funny stories, and humorous media that can bring a smile or a laugh to help break some of the everyday tension.

4. Love

Having loving and supportive relationships is a tremendous asset that helps one cope and manage life stressors. This can be found through intimate relationships, close friendships, supportive family, raising children, or caring for pets. These types of loving relationships have been shown to increase personal resilience, coping, and overall health.

5. Nutrition

Making healthy nutritional choices and following a balanced diet brings countless physical and emotional health benefits. Nutrition basics to follow include not skipping meals, staying hydrated, keeping healthy snacks at hand, and understanding how to read and interpret nutritional labels on foods.

Caregiving Essential Reads

Jenga and the Caregiver's Journey

What Is an End-of-Life Doula?

6. Physical activity

The wide array of health benefits from regular physical activity is well known. It’s important to intentionally plan for several periods of concentrated physical activity each week and to include a variety of aerobic and strength-building exercises to provide optimal health benefits. Adequate sleep and rest are vital components of overall physical self-care.

7. Play

We certainly know about the effects of “all work and no play.” To combat the overwhelming stresses of helping and caregiving, activities that incorporate deliberate playfulness should be part of one’s overall self-care plan. Look for opportunities to get outdoors, explore new destinations, and, most importantly, have some fun.

8. Setting priorities

Let’s face it: There’s never enough time to get everything done. With today’s technology, it’s easy to be “on-call” 24/7/365 and to fall prey to information and media overload. Therefore, it’s critical to take time to set priorities to separate work from home and to carefully manage our time in a way that’s consistent with our most important personal values.

9. Recreation

Having active interests and hobbies can be another great way to promote self-care. You can get lost in your Star Wars or decorative china collections or spend an enjoyable afternoon bird-watching or playing the guitar. Or perhaps it’s time to take up a new hobby to immerse yourself in to bring a renewed sense of excitement and personal satisfaction to your life.

10. Relaxation

While helpers and caregivers can be great teachers of stress management and relaxation techniques to others, they sometimes forget to use these beneficial practices on themselves. Remember to incorporate times for relaxation, mindfulness, or yoga, as these can be tremendously effective in reducing stress and bringing greater focus and clarity.

11. Solitude

Since helpers and caregivers spend a large amount of time working around others, it’s vital to build in some alone time each day or at least a few times per week. Periods of solitude can be used for reflection, planning, or to incorporate some of the previously mentioned strategies, such as exercise, hobbies, relaxation, or play.

12. Spirituality

Spirituality means different things to different people, but including faith-based activities such as church attendance, spiritual reading, or prayer can help one connect with one’s own spiritual or religious beliefs and provide avenues for social connection and support with like-minded others.

Collectively, these 12 strategies for promoting self-care for helpers and caregivers encompass the four key dimensions of emotional, physical, intellectual, and spiritual health. While I have characterized these strategies as important for the well-being and self-care of helpers and caregivers, it’s probably no surprise that they can help almost anyone cope better with personal challenges and stress. Give them a try and see.

Copyright David Susman 2024