Verified by 
A Facebook friend posted today: “I am staying up past midnight New Year’s Eve, not to welcome in the new year, but to make sure the old one leaves.” To be sure, many of us are relieved to see this year go. It was tough in many respects. To help you “reset” as we turn the page, here are three questions to ponder, going forward:
What are two difficult challenges you overcame this year? Rather than thinking about what handed us our butts in 2020, I suggest focusing instead on things you handled well as evidence of your resilience. How did you do that? How can you carry those skills forward into 2021?
For example, in lieu of gym access at the worst times in the past months, I introduced a routine of walking 2.5-6 miles every day, sometimes by myself, sometimes with the spouse. No, I don’t count steps. I just walk through various neighborhoods, usually in daylight, so I can see people, and clouds, and sunsets. I did this with such regularity that folks in the next town over sometimes stop to chat, and in one instance, a group, at the top of the most challenging hill of all these routes, offered champagne, which we gratefully accepted.
Speaking of gratitude, can you name one or two people, things, or events from the year that’s almost over that granted you experiences of gratitude? Why gratitude? Research demonstrates at least 28 benefits of being grateful, including improving psychological and physical health, enhancing empathy, reducing aggression, boosting self-esteem, and even improved sleep. For example, since my immediate family members all live under the same roof, we’re in the same “pod” or “bubble," and we had a normal holiday this month, which I was very grateful for. Also, my biological mom and my second mom, my best friend’s mother, are still with us at ages 84 and 94, respectively, and I got to talk with each of them on the 25th. The gratitude I experienced in being able to do that was immense.
What’s one very manageable thing (not too big or earth-shattering) you could continue doing, or start doing, in 2021 that would make life a tiny bit better? I think I like to cook; I used to do it back in the day, but I haven’t done much of in the past seven years. I have a million excuses, such as my wife is a vegetarian and my kids are carnivores and it isn’t easy to keep them all happy, and my spouse is a fantastic cook (which is something else to express gratitude for). But I do like to create in the kitchen, just when no one is around. So, I am going to start looking for opportunities to prepare a meal once every week or so, when no one is underfoot. I can crank up some tunes and throw something together. This represents another avenue for self-expression and to make a contribution to the effort of providing nutrition and sustenance for my family. If they don’t eat the meal I prepare, I will. What’s one little thing you can do to expand your horizons in the coming year?
Here’s hoping that in this new year we actively look for things for which to be grateful, seize opportunities to demonstrate resilience, and come up with new ways to expand our sense of self and what we are capable of. That’s plenty to look forward to.
References
Ackerman, C.E. (2020). 28 benefits of gratitude & most significant research findings. Positive Psychology website: https://positivepsychology.com/benefits-gratitude-research-questions/
