A Cheesy New Way to Break Up on Valentine's Day

Is sending someone a pizza the right way of breaking up with someone?

Source: Photo by Muffin Creatives from Pexels

If you're looking to break up with your partner, you can now get a pizza delivery person to do the dirty work for you. Until Valentine's Day, you can order a "Goodbye Pizza" from Pizza Hut. Although the pizza is drizzled with honey, it's more likely to leave a bitter taste. In fact, it even comes in a box with a picture of a broken pizza heart.

And if you feel that you should at least give some kind of explanation to your about-to-be ex, the company also provides an online excuse generator. You can order from a menu of cheesy explanations: "You ate all my cheese sticks and didn't offer to replace them." "I'm the heir to a throne of a faraway land and I must save my kingdom from impending evil." "We want different things. For example, I want someone else, and you want me."

Sending a pizza with a cooked-up excuse may not be the most appropriate way to break up with a former lover. OK, perhaps if the other person cheated on you and you've already made it clear that the breach of trust is just too egregious, then, yes, maybe a pie in that person's figurative face would make sense. Breaking up with some humor instead of ranting, raving, and revenge can provide the slices that you feel you need.

But if your soon-to-be-insignificant other has little idea about why you are leaving the relationship, sending a hot pizza can be a cold way of departing. Instead, consider providing a more legitimate explanation in a face-to-face setting that shows much more compassion for the other person. After all, you did spend all those [insert length of time that you dated here] days, weeks, or years being intimate with each other.

Sure, it's likely harder to deliver the news in person. But imagine how hard it may be for the person who gave you his or her heart. As the saying goes, how you exit may say more about you than how you enter. Plus, you never know what will happen down the road. Will you someday encounter that person when each of you is older and wiser? Who knows, maybe by then you'd have resolved issues that prevent a successful relationship today.

Even if you are pretty darn sure that the other person is never going to be right for you, who knows what role that person or someone who knows that person will play in your life? There's a big difference between being the person who cared to explain the break-up in person and the bleep who let a pizza do the talking. Regardless of what may happen in the future, showing respect and compassion for the other person is the right thing to do. Always treat others how you yourself would want to be treated.

So, you may want to save the sauce for the right situation. Think about the circumstances surrounding the break-up before giving the delivery person a "pizza" the action.