My Side of the Couch

Gaslighting

The Damage Done by Constant Parental Gaslighting

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on May 6, 2024

Plus the traits that make some parents more likely to do it.

Plus the traits that make some parents more likely to do it.

Relationships

How to Grow a Thicker Skin

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on February 12, 2024

Have you been told that you are too sensitive and need to grow a thicker skin? Make sure you do it the healthy way.

Have you been told that you are too sensitive and need to grow a thicker skin? Make sure you do it the healthy way.

Borderline Personality Disorder

Borderline Personality Disorder and the Weaponization of Words

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on December 24, 2023

Do you know someone with BPD who attacks everything you say when they disagree with you? Learn how to protect yourself from the weaponization of your words.

Do you know someone with BPD who attacks everything you say when they disagree with you? Learn how to protect yourself from the weaponization of your words.

Boundaries

How to Set Interpersonal Boundaries Gently

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on December 10, 2023

Are you uncomfortable setting boundaries with others? Learn how to be gentle.

Are you uncomfortable setting boundaries with others? Learn how to be gentle.

Confidence

When Your Therapist Is Wrong

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on November 3, 2023

Do you feel like your therapist has made an error in your treatment? How to continue therapy with confidence.

Do you feel like your therapist has made an error in your treatment? How to continue therapy with confidence.

Boundaries

Couples Without Boundaries

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on October 22, 2023

How to enjoy the company of couples without boundaries—without becoming enmeshed.

How to enjoy the company of couples without boundaries—without becoming enmeshed.

Family Dynamics

3 Essential Ways to Optimize Your Grandparent Experience

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on September 15, 2023

Are you the best grandparent you can be? Here are three suggestions that can help build and strengthen the relationship with your grandchild.

Are you the best grandparent you can be? Here are three suggestions that can help build and strengthen the relationship with your grandchild.

Borderline Personality Disorder

Intimacy Difficulties in Adult Children of Borderline Sufferers

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on August 29, 2023

Do you have trouble trusting others and sharing yourself with them? This may be due to having been parented by someone with BPD.

Do you have trouble trusting others and sharing yourself with them? This may be due to having been parented by someone with BPD.

Personality Disorders

Recovering From Borderline Personality Disorder

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on August 13, 2023

Have you benefited from DBT but still don't feel right? Maybe you need to add another treatment technique to your toolbox.

Have you benefited from DBT but still don't feel right? Maybe you need to add another treatment technique to your toolbox.

Anger

Borderline Rage

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on July 8, 2023

Learn how to respond effectively to their rageful reactions to minor infractions.

Learn how to respond effectively to their rageful reactions to minor infractions.

Relationships

BPD and Transactional Relationships

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on June 12, 2023

Understanding the limitations of transactional relationships can help you maximize the relationship while protecting yourself from disappointment and acting out.

Understanding the limitations of transactional relationships can help you maximize the relationship while protecting yourself from disappointment and acting out.

Fear

Why Your Loved One With BPD Frantically Avoids Abandonment

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on May 17, 2023

Does your loved one with symptoms of BPD expect you to come running at any time of day? Are you punished for showing up? Here is a different strategy.

Does your loved one with symptoms of BPD expect you to come running at any time of day? Are you punished for showing up? Here is a different strategy.

Relationships

Spontaneity and Intimacy: Should You Let It All Hang Out?

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on May 9, 2023

Do you find that expressing your feelings to others doesn't always go well? It might have to do with how you're expressing them.

Do you find that expressing your feelings to others doesn't always go well? It might have to do with how you're expressing them.

Relationships

Borderline Personality Disorder and Social Isolation

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on March 26, 2023

Does your loved one try to separate you from your friends, loved ones, and associates? You might be triangulated.

Does your loved one try to separate you from your friends, loved ones, and associates? You might be triangulated.

Passive-Aggression

How to Deal With Passive and Passive-Aggressive People

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on March 21, 2023

Are you frustrated with passive and passive-aggressive people? Learn how to take back control.

Are you frustrated with passive and passive-aggressive people? Learn how to take back control.

Embarrassment

Borderline Personality Disorder and Shame

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on March 4, 2023

Do you know someone who's sensitive to feeling shamed? Understanding their fear and pain can help stabilize the relationship.

Do you know someone who's sensitive to feeling shamed? Understanding their fear and pain can help stabilize the relationship.

Forgiveness

3 Ways to Hold a Blame-Shifter Responsible

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on February 19, 2023

Frustrated by others blaming you for their errors? Here's how you can better hold them responsible.

Frustrated by others blaming you for their errors? Here's how you can better hold them responsible.

Relationships

Why Some People with BPD Engage in Character Assassination

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on February 14, 2023

Character assassination can be devastating. Here's what it is and where it may come from.

Character assassination can be devastating. Here's what it is and where it may come from.

Parenting

When Children Give Up on Parents: Beyond the Breaking Point

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on January 9, 2023

Have your children stopped asking you for help and affection? They might be at their breaking point.

Have your children stopped asking you for help and affection? They might be at their breaking point.

Alcoholism

The Doctor Learns Humility

Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. on December 31, 2022

A personal perspective: An incorrect assumption leads to a lifelong lesson in the power of humility.

A personal perspective: An incorrect assumption leads to a lifelong lesson in the power of humility.